Things You Didn't Know About Them
by KillforKlondike
Summary: Some fun facts that I bet you never knew about some of your favorite Transformers. *PS Don't tell them were I'm hiding!*


**Up till now I don't think I've ever really written about the G1 universe. I shall change this immediately! They had all the cool characters. Ever since then the cast seems to be getting smaller and smaller. Why? Why did you cut them out? AND make them ugly (though the alt modes are hot)?**

**DISCLAIMER:** I own nothing! Don't sue me please!

* * *

**Things you didn't Know about the Transformers**

Ratchet is a Mortal Combat whizz. FINISH HIM. *Pixel Ratchet does a dance with a wrench.*

Jazz's email is Jazzilicious and of course it's registered in hotmail. Why hotmail? Because it describes him so well.

Sunstreaker has 'I'm Too Sexy' by Right Said Fred playing on repeat on his off duty time.

Optimus Prime's favorite pizza is pepperoni. True fact…even though he can't eat it.

Megatron has taken a side job. He's figured out a new way to torture young humans: He's teaching math.

It is not to be assumed that since both Prowl and Ratchet have those horns on their head, they are on there because they're horny. They did not appreciate the accusation either. Sideswipe thought it was a hoot though.

Ironhide had to give Bumblebee 'the Talk' back on Cybertron. Ever since he's been terrified of femmes.

Barricade once tried to send Red Alert some sexy databurst just to fry the Autobot communication officer's processor. It never went through. Soundwave may or may not be responsible for this. He wouldn't respond to my questioning over whether or not he saved the images. Frenzy however gave me thumbs up so I took it as a yes.

Starscream once abducted a litter of kittens and set them loose inside Megatron's private quarters. Megatron wasn't impressed when he found the first one. Scraping the unrecognizable goo off his ped was not a very fun experience.

Sunstreaker did a strip tease in front of Ratchet after being promised a complete wash, wax, and detailing. Ironhide has never made a more satisfactory bet since then.

Prowl once woke up from recharge with large, angry-face emoticons painted on his door wings. No one said anything until a conference meeting with Prime. No one was ever found to be punished, however Prowl glared at Jazz for several weeks afterwards.

Hound once came across two deer mating. He then felt the need to rush back to the base and tell everyone the details. Ironhide, who had beforehand been happy to come along with the humans on what they'd called a deer hunt, was now unwilling to go anywhere near the creatures.

Way back on Cybertron, before the war, Skywarp actually worked for Wheeljack at one point. Unfortunately they didn't work together very well. When Skywarp quit he left a good sized bomb in a box that was labeled 'Important'. Thankfully Wheeljack didn't open the box. Though Perceptor did. He was not impressed.

When asked to tell what they would ask for if they had three wishes, Bumblebee and Thundercracker amazingly asked for the same three things: More (pretty) femmes, plenty of energon, and less annoying coworkers.

Though they will never admit to working together, Blaster and Soundwave anonymously held a Christmas party for some human orphans where two very unique looking boom boxes were playing seasonal music. There was even a visit from a very big, red, _metal_ Santa Claus wearing a Santa hat, an Autobot symbol, and a canon.

Wheeljack was happy to answer my questions about his favorite earth things. However I was highly concerned when he said that his favorite movie was A Little Shop of Horrors and was presently trying to recreate the plant that was in the movie. I ran for my life.

Little known fact, that if he asks, I know nothing about: Megatron has a daughter….I know! Hard to believe. Starscream apparently met her once when she was a sparkling. I can't remember what he said her name was…I think it sounded something like RV…Oh well, doesn't matter.

Fun fact: Jazz is distantly related to Blaster and Soundwave. Blaster introduced him to music. Soundwave introduced him to espionage.

The most disturbing thing that Mirage says he's ever seen when spying while invisible was when he saw Megatron and Starscream making out on the Nemesis. And the door to Megatron's door was locked so all the poor mech could do was stand in a corner for a cycle (aka two HOURS).

There's a rumor in the Nemesis that somewhere on the ship is a secret stash of some…well, um…explicit pictures of femmes that were hidden by Hook. However since then I have come to find out that it is not on the Nemesis and it was not hidden by Hook. It was Shockwave with the Laptop in the Command tower! I win Colonel Mustard!

While hiding under one of the table in the Rec. room I overheard Ironhide, Ratchet, and Prowl discussing *DUN DUN DUN* SOAP OPERAS like stay-at-home wives. Apparently they like 'The Bold and the Beautiful'. I screamed like a little girl and ran for my life when Prowl saw me staring at them.

Okay, what's next…wait, what the heck is that sound? Oh my God! No! Oh God, quick post this before they can stop me!

* * *

So what did you think? Was it crap or okay? I've been trying to make myself work on at least one thing since it may be a bit before I can write anything. I'm behind on classes and now I'm trying to work on my speeches and memorizing is killing my brain.


End file.
